Monday, March 29, 2010

Signal

The road is one interesting place to be on. I like it and I hate it. It’s amazing, irritating, challenging, frustrating, amusing, offending and hilarious all at once. If getting to office is a challenge, going back home is an even tougher one.

So what is that I love about the roads? The people: driving, trying to drive, walking, talking, braking while talking, shuffling music, honking, overtaking, waiting, advising, eating, smiling, screaming, crossing, doing everything, doing nothing… And what do I hate? Well, most of it, most of the time. I enjoy the nonsense at times, ignore it as I please on others; but there are times when it really gets to me. Phew! those are the days that cloud my memory.  What do I do? Where do I go from here? So here's it: I come up with my own thesis. You could do the same. Pay a little more attention to the life around you. It's fun. Plus it is safe (hurts no one, you see). Here’s mine on the new founded rules of signaling. Ignore at your own peril.


  1. If you are on the left of the road (because you want to turn left) with your indicator signaling left, pay all the attention you can to the drivers on your left. If the auto fellow / the uncle on the bike on your left is looking right, beware, he’ll cut right before you can yell your favourite expletive. Replace left with right if you are going right. 
  2. If the driver on your left is looking straight ahead as though he has just developed a stiff-neck, he is going straight.
  3. If an overtaking bike / auto driver looks sideways, the new signal theory states that he is heading in that direction. The indicators on his vehicle are for ornamental purpose only.
  4. All metropolitan transport bus drivers are super self-trained to lunge the bus right before heading straight or even left. The more you remember this, the better for your multi-lakh fancy car.
  5. I have a specific ‘DO NOT FOLLOW THIS VEHICLE / STEER CLEAR OF THIS VEHICLE’ chart for vehicles with a certain RTO registration and also for cars and bikes of a certain make. Works for me. Make one for yourself. 

The colour of advertising

Just another day in the ad world. Just another conversation, one among the many madnesses the poor devils in the agency encounter.
Patrick: Client | Linda: Client Servicing Executive
Hi Linda
Hi Patrick
Good morning.
Good morning.
The stuff we were looking at yesterday…?
Oh, the ad? Yes…
Can we have it in some other colour?
Any other colour? Why?
No… it is nice. But I was just wondering if we can have it in any other colour.
But Patrick, I think blood red will suit our purpose best. It will really stand out. And in any case, we’ve seen the other options and decided on this one.
May be we should try pale pink….?
(What!)

And elsewhere in the same office
Hi….
Hi..
I want to change that deep blue to may be light beige…?
Light beige? But.
I think that would be look nice.
But...
(Excitedly) Let’s do that.
The servicing guy promptly faints.